The Sense Connection

Discovering How Your Five Senses Determine Your Effectiveness as a Person, Partner, and Parent

By: Natalie Robinson Garfield

For parents, understanding The Sense Connection enhances the skills needed to raise happy, well-adjusted children who will become successful, emotionally-balanced adults. For spouses or lovers, gaining insight into the ways in which primary sense channels compliment and conflict with each other can shift the balance from discord to harmony. And for friends and co-workers, a firmer grasp of how we as individuals view the world could mean more fulfilling and productive relationships and careers.

Can understanding others be as simple as identifying their primary sense channels and adjusting accordingly? Naturally, the sense mode does not define the entire personality. But it can offer you some useful short-cuts to understanding. Consider the many ways we put ourselves and others into neat, tidy, limiting pigeonholes. We’ve heard so many of these expressions: “What do you do?”, “Where are you from?”, “What’s your sign?” These categorizations are merely stereotypes, whether professional, regional, ethnic, astrological, or even the result of The Myers-Briggs examination. Worse than that, they’re dead ends. “He’s an only child.”

“She’s a Pisces.” These stereotypes do not allow room for adaptation, for coming together and making a connection. By adding The Sense Connection to our lexicon, we can find a way to understand others quickly and accurately and then modify our interactive style to fit better with theirs, whatever their profession, cultural background, or birth sign.

Chapters Overview

Part I: Defining the Sense Connection

  • Common Sense
  • Sense Mode Profile Test
  • Sense Connections

Part II: Relationships

  • The “Click of a Couple
  • Sexual Incompatibility
  • Psychotherapy
  • Friendships

Part III : Parenting

  • Duo- Dyads
  • How Quickly They Grow
  • Sibling Favoritism
  • Tuning into a Pre-teen
  • Preparing for the Future

Part IV : Applications

  • Interview Intuition
  • Office Frantics
  • Classroom Frantics
  • Classroom and Consequence
  • Attorney Attunement

Part V: Four Our Selves

  • Model Meditation
  • Maturing Modes
  • Sense Secrets

“The Sense Mode Profile Test offered in the book takes this simple but illusive topic and allows the reader to appreciate and respond to the diversity of Sense Connections we encounter daily. I recommend this book to friends, lovers, mothers, fathers, and all members of the health professions.”
Sukie Miller, PhD. Founder of the Institute for Humanistic Medicine, early director of Esalen Institute and author.

“Natalie Robinson Garfield’s The Sense Connection is not only a great tool for parents looking to create an effective connection with their babies and children, but for aunts and uncles as well, whose time with their nieces and nephews is often limited. Developing meaningful and powerful connections every time we see these kids is vital to our ability to bond and keep that “cool” aunt and uncle status we’re doing our best to earn and keep with each visit.”

Melanie Notkin, founder of

“Natalie strikes an essential chord in understanding the matrix of love. She teaches new ways of finding the bond that helps couple’s work through their challenges.”

Armand Di Mele, founder of The Di Mele Center for Psychotherapy, Counseling, and Research, producer and host of the popular radio program, The Positive Mind on WBAI-FM.
Lili Zarabi


Natalie Robinson Garfield has been a practicing psychotherapist in Manhattan and Long Island for over thirty years, specializing in parent-child education. Holding a degree in Infant and Toddler Development and Administration, Garfield has had an extensive career working in individual, couple, family and group therapy. THE SENSE CONNECTION, based on the theory of sense channel hierarchy, draws on her experience working with private patients and conducting large conferences, discussion groups and workshops. Garfield’s has primarily focused on psychological and developmental work, but she also has a background in program design, staff training and administration.

Garfield was part of the New Age movement in the 1970s, working with The Association for Humanistic Psychology, which sought to move toward a more aware and humane global society. She also designed and directed various programs within the Children’s Aid Society, which provided education for families about subjects ranging from childbirth preparation through parenting. Garfield has also served on the United Nations Commission for the International Year of the Child, bringing awareness to problems such as malnutrition and lack of educational access, affecting children around the world.

She has had over forty years experience as a consultant, supervising and training staff for various institutions, including AT&T, American Express, The Gesell Institute for Child Development, The Montefiore Medical Residency Program, The Gestalt Learning Center, and the Kings County District Attorney’s office.

Garfield is a founding member of the Association for Parent Education and is a featured expert on various television documentaries and radio shows, such as WYNY, CBS Documentary, CBS Evening News, Current Affair Extra, and ABC Eyewitness News. She is also frequently interviewed by news media such as New York Magazine, Self, Working Woman, Cosmopolitan and Parents Magazine. She lives and works in New York City.


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